I thought I saw a putty-tat... I did! I DID!

In the spirit of Big Daddy Drew's penchant for Animal Snuff Porn, I had to post this.

I think it's the first blatantly non sports related post. Sue me. It's awesome.

The Battle In Brooklyn

On September 8, 2007, I get a long awaited rematch. This time, not only am I dating a Duck, but I live with her too.

Oh I can't wait.

The 2007 Fantasy Team Names and Logos

The White Trash Moonshiners — New to the league this year, but coming through with a solid name.




















The Hatin Ass Haters — Brilliant... possibly my favorite, definitely top 3.




















Gallo Pinto con Juevos — He stuck with his Costa Rican theme this year (formerly "Poopie Fuerte y Las Obraderos," which means "Strong Shit and the Runs"); logo plays off the double meaning of "juevos."




















Dr. Dingle — He stuck with his dingleberry theme (formerly "SWV — Sistas With Dingleberries" and "Dingleberry Crunch"), although he dropped the berries. Logo is solid, incorporating a Chappelle Show reference AND a South Park reference.




















The Diapered Astronaut Stalkers — The name was ridiculous (as was the story that inspired it), so I had to come up with an equally psychotic logo. How about a circa 1960s cosmonaut stalking Bettie Page?




















Buck O Five — Always remember that freedom isn't free. If you don't chip in your buck o five, who will? Thank you Team America for fighting the good fight.



















B-Town Suburbanites — Keeps the same name, as always, but got a new logo. He likes the Mets, and we don't like him (in fantasy because he's a bastard), so he gets a Mike Vick inspired logo.




















Bomb Ass Pricks — Sticking with the prick theme this year (formerly "Yuppie Pricks" and "Prick or Treat"), but with a major upgrade. If you don't know the David Terrell "bomb ass dick" story, you better ask somebody. This is probably my favorite logo.




















Al TurBundy — Sticking with the turban theme here (formerly "Turban Development," "The Ron Turbandy Experience" and "Old Grand Daddy Kentucky Turban"). This is a great name and logo because this team manager will actually still talk about his domination of JV high school football. It's so fitting.




















The Chosen Ones — Keeps the same name, as always, but got a new logo. Gets his Jets green. Solid concept and design.

Jesus hates the Yankees

I will be the first to admit that my unconditional love for the Orioles died in the late 90s, as did my interest in the MLB.

I am now a Nationals fan, only because DC will always be my home. I like that they have a team, and want them to succeed. I still wish the Orioles well, and I'll root for them when they are playing anyone other than the Nats.

That said, my undying, lifelong hatred of the Yankees will never subside. That is why I am happy to pass along this amazing photo. It was taken by two of my friends while they were on their way to Camden Yards.

Priceless.

Hail to Sean and Ariel for the image.















EDIT: Apparently he hates the O's too.

The Rocky Joints

Cooley has been done. Swoop has been done. LaRon has been done. Even Art got some love (gotta show some love to ArtMonkToTheSticks for the quote).

Next up, Rocky McIntosh. Enjoy... and as always, F the Eagles.






The "Rocky LII" joint. For some reason, whenever I think of absurd numbers of sequels, I think of the Jason and Freddy movies, the scene from Back To The Future Part II where "Jaws 19" is showing at a movie theater and, of course, the Rocky series.



















The "Rocky Punch" joint. I like this one because it's simple, iconic and a direct blow to Philly pride.









The "Rocky Don't Need HGH" joint. This one is my favorite, but as my buddy stated, this "shirt's pretty much a guarantee that he tests positive by mid-season."

Stay strong Rocky.

Head coach of...?

Do all black head coaches look the same to you fanball.com?

Greg Olsen, TE, Chicago Bears
Tuesday 8/14, 12:38 PM CT
Rookie tight end Greg Olsen continues to look like he'll be a factor in the Bears' offensive game plan this season. The Chicago Sun Times reports that Olsen is consistently the go-to guy in third-down drills and the team is getting creative in finding ways to put the ball in his hands. And after Olsen made two grabs in Chicago's preseason opener, head coach Romeo Crennel told wire reporters, "I have a feeling he will make a lot of those catches over the course of the year."

Todd Stinkston

What is there to say? I mean... wow. Although I have to admit that I remembered it being Swoop who so famously scared the bejeebus out of Pinky. Turns out it was actually Ryan Clark.



The one good thing about this signing is that it gives me an excuse to link to Pro Football Talk's long running Pinkston/Pasquarelli joke, move on or move out.

Hail to Bram Weinstein's Covering The Redskins for the news.

Blech! A Cowgirls post... I need a shower.

Further proof that Jerry Jones is either partially cyborg, or no longer human at all. He will outlive everyone, I swear. Being rich is great... but he'll always be a Cowgirl.



Hail to With Leather for the video.

The Right to Fight

As much as I abhor dog fighting and anyone who willingly participates in it, I refuse to throw away the Constitution in these matters. This is why the protests of some animal rights advocates, who seem to be calling for Michael Vick's head on a platter before his trial, are very disturbing to me.

Dan Wetzel from Yahoo! Sports wrote an interesting article about what he witnessed outside the Federal Courthouse in Richmond, VA. It's a little disturbing for the reason I outlined in the first paragraph, but more so because of a rather apparent racial divide in the protesters.

I believe that Michael Vick should be strapped to a rapestand in the prison yard for an hour each and every day of his sentence IF AND ONLY IF he is guilty of this crime. But let the man have his day in court.

Here's a snippet from Wetzel's article:

Obviously, both animal rights advocates and due process proponents come in all colors. And certainly a circus show like this, revved up by a massive media presence, isn't representative of America.

But, then again, I also know what I saw and what I heard.

"They are not going to give the man a chance?" Williams said. "You're innocent until proven guilty. He hasn't even had a trial yet."

There should be two undeniable, 100 percent agreed upon truths concerning this case: First, dog fighting is a barbaric felony and whoever participated in it on Vick's property should get hammered by the justice system.

Second, Vick deserves the right to defend against the charges. The indictment cites four "cooperating witnesses," but presuming each is a dog fighter himself, potentially facing prosecution unless they rolled on Vick, who and how reliable are they?

That said, the U.S. Attorney's office is known for its detail and diligence – this isn't some hack county prosecutor like the Duke lacrosse case. They rarely lose, so the challenge for Vick is serious and significant. But he has the right to fight.

Do you have any Kool-Aid to go with those glasses?

HEY! I got a pair just like those. Apparently I was wearing them when I did my season predictions and ended up at 10-6. I guess we all wear them from time to time.

Since the NFC East is hard to predict with accuracy, I split it 3-3 to start (giving each team the home win). Here's my predicted breakdown for the season:

W v. MIAMI
L @ EAGLES
W v. GIANTS
W v. LIONS
W @ PACKERS
W v. CARDINALS
L @ PATRIOTS
L @ JETS
W v. EAGLES
L @ COWBOYS
W @ BUCCANEERS
W v. BILLS
L v. BEARS
L @ GIANTS
W @ VIKINGS
W v. COWBOYS

Pure Hottness

I want to thank Redskins Insider poster JustMe for his Redskins training camp Flicker album. If it wasn't for him, I would not get to see this example of pure hottness.

I can't wait until they walk it out together.

Damn Gil... you gotta give credit

Gilbertology uncovered the origins of Gil's "shark attack" musings.

If you learn anything from blogging, Gil, it's got to be "give proper credit to ALL sources."

Right Gil Brandt? Wait a minute... what's up with guys named Gil and plagiarism?

Oh Gil... how I love thee

From Gil's latest blog entry:

There Are No Such Thing as Shark Attacks

I know this is random, but I just want to clear this up for people out there.

There are these things called shark attacks, but there is no such thing as a shark attack. I have never seen a real shark attack.

I know you’re making a weird face as you’re reading this. OK people, a shark attack is not what we see on TV and what people portray it as.

We’re humans. We live on land.

Sharks live in water.

So if you’re swimming in the water and a shark bites you, that’s called trespassing. That is called trespassing. That is not a shark attack.

A shark attack is if you’re chilling at home, sitting on your couch, and a shark comes in and bites you; now that’s a shark attack. Now, if you’re chilling in the water, that is called invasion of space. So I have never heard of a shark attack.

When I see on the news where it’s like, “There have been 10 shark attacks,” I’m like, “Hey, for real?! They’re just running around? Sharks are walking now, huh! We live on the land, we don’t live underwater.”